3:30 a.m. (approx.) Eric woke me to say good-bye; he was leaving for San Francisco. I felt affection and also anger (at being disturbed). Mind wanted to engage in a story about how Eric tries to keep me from working toward my own goals by creating a constant crisis situation in his own life. Noticed the story was threatening to keep me awake, so turned to meditation -- and fell back to sleep.
7:20 a.m. About 20 minutes self-metta while sitting in bed. Gradually increased attention for the sense of metta over the time period; gently noted and dismissed fear and resistance. Allowing the sense of metta is like getting into a warm bath. Got up to get cough drop, use bathroom, drink water; intended to return to meditation but instead stayed up to get ready for the work day.
Decided to take a sick day.
10:00 a.m. 73 minutes self-metta. I felt like I really needed it. The words "may I be free from terror" were the ones that brought the most release.
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