A few years ago I was sitting in front of Musashi's, my favorite sushi joint, waiting for my partner Eric. I meditated while waiting, focusing on the sensations in my belly as I breathed. Eric was running late, and I thought that meditation would be a useful way of responding to the irritation I felt. Indeed, the meditation made me feel more comfortable, and took my mind off of the irritation.
My eyes were still closed when Eric arrived and made his presence known. Immediately I felt the irritation rise up, as strong as ever. Had meditation only distracted me from my anger?
I've been a dedicated meditation practitioner for ten years. Meditation has helped me notice the sensations associated with anger, and has helped me recognize when I'm angry. And it has certainly given me a tool for getting my mind off of something that is angering me. But it hasn't seemed to help me stop feeling blocked up, helpless, vulnerable, and utterly furious when I am angered.
No comments:
Post a Comment