Thursday, and even more so, Friday and Saturday of last week, I felt very down. Very fatigued and inclined to think negatively. It became especially bad Saturday evening. Everything I perceived, I interpreted negatively. I began to think there was something really wrong with me, that I must have some chronic, degenerative disease. (I did look up RA on the web Friday before going home from work.)
Saturday evening I read one of John Sarno's books on how tension can create pain, and fear can magnify the pain. As I read the book I gradually felt better. The next morning I felt 100% my usual optimistic self.
Possible cause: cappuccino Wednesday night. First coffee in years. It was delicious, and it kept me up (enjoyable) most of the night, but maybe now that I'm older my caffeine crashes are more severe.
Regardless of the cause of this temporary depression, I experienced Saturday how fear can compound the situation. I was afraid, and then I was afraid of my fear. Then I thought I'd better watch a comedy movie to distract myself. Tried "When Harry Met Sally", but after 40 minutes I still hadn't laughed. It just wasn't that funny.
That kind of depression has not returned in the 2 weeks since this post.
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